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Thursday, June 19, 2008

learn to forgive and forget
learn to accept and letgo.
that's what i'm trying to do now. You know, i hate things to get bitchy and somehow i'm stuck in the middle of it with loads of other people. Come on, we are already sec3, i don't wanna relive those days when we were young and retarded and petty. But if only someone gives in, everything will be fine. maybe when you feel as if the world is against you, why not give it a thought and wonder if you are the cause of making yourself sad and depressed. you might think " so what jr, like you are depressed? you've never been depressed and pissed of is it? moreover, you are talking as if you know a lot"

er yea, you might be right. i might not be as wise as i think. but i feel that i'm not doing anything wrong by writing this down. it's not out to make some people feel like crap or anything. it's just a neutral point of view. yesterday was so depressing. i forgot high school musical and claire's birthday. gosh, and i was still talking to high school musi-- okok let's use his name. HANSHEN. yea i was talking to him about supernatural and how awesome jensen ackles it ( sizzling hot guy) and then i totally didn't wish him till i found out the next day. how did i find out? i was sitting beside beatrice yeong cuz somebody gave me the "ew, you are sitting here? get lost" kind of look. i shrug it off. like hey, when was the last time i took the time to catch up with my friend of 5 yrs? so i was looking at her... and it dawned on me that i forgot two important ppl's birthday and started whinning to beatrice yeong and she laughed at me. anyway, i went to apologise and bea and i went down to the foyer. funny how it seems that time passes so fast.

then i saw it. the chinese o level exam schedule. i was very excited. and i saw my name

CHEONG JIA RONG 8/7 ( last person on that list to go )

my mind went blank. What the HELL?!?!? it's on my 15 birthday! and then how often do you turn 15?!?! and i'm the last one. it's common sense my turn will take forever come. and i'll waste my hold birthday afternoon sitting on the stage with my kuo shi book in my lap trying to stay calm. i was asking hanshen if this was retribution for forgetting his birthday. he swears he has nothing to do with it -.- yea that's probably true. i thought he cast a dark magic. (i'm watching too much supernatural shows). yea, yesterday was really really down. had a chat with nicole. she says we've been teaching sectionals like forever and how she's gonna miss me . sob* yea i will REALLY REALLY miss the seniorsss..then it feels like we're bring abandoned. then at 10.20pm, someone called me and told me something. i was a bit shocked to hear it. but i'll treasure it and make sure i do it properly. i'll give it my best, the best i can do.

today was so funny. went to j8 library with jean, eunice and ruoyu. then nicole came to crash for lunch and laughed super loudly. i'll miss that laugh (: then we saw liyana. then we practised kuo shi in the library and it was so hilarious cuz what ever i talk about, i'll drag in the parents. "parents are children's role model" "parents should teach their children well" etc. damn crap. but i really had a great time to know all of them better (:::

oh well, i shall not brood too much over the kou shi incident. i mean what's coming has to come. why not look on the brighter side. I wished we could go back to the past where you were more understanding and willing to let me help you. i'm not really comfortable with what is going on. we are a team and we should thrash it out. only if you let us.




2:46 AM